It’s hard to believe that these were taken three weeks ago.
Before I was wheeled into the OR, Jake whispered, “I love you” one last time into my right ear. Hearing those words in that moment gave me a last boost of courage to face what I knew was going to be a very rough 24-48 hours. When I woke up from surgery and looked at the clock on the wall, the entire wall fell to the side. This happened every time I opened my eyes. It was nauseating. Yesterday I walked three large laps at the mall with my mother-in-law and today I walked around our block on my own. It is amazing how quickly our brains can adapt to major change.
I’ve been reflecting back on the last three weeks a lot lately. So much has transpired in such a short amount of time. I had brain surgery and was discharged from the hospital three days later! That blows my mind. When I left the hospital, I was still dizzy, and not completely balanced, but mostly capable of walking on my own. That blows my mind. The prayers and emails, texts, and blog post comments continue. That blows my mind. (And also makes me smile.)
There have been a few people throughout this ordeal who have told Jake that they started praying for me after not having been to church or praying in years. Others have shared that reading about what my recovery has entailed has caused them to “reset” so to say and not take for granted the simple things in life that they are able to do without thinking twice – walking, picking something up off the floor, driving kids to and from. I’ve even heard that kids have told their parents they are praying for me (without any prompting.) <Insert my tears here.>
After I was told I had a brain tumor last fall, I began to pray for healing. It seemed like a logical prayer request. Little did I know I should have been more specific. God saw it fit to start healing areas in my life that I didn’t realize needed healing. It took facing Norman to bring me to a place where I could see that my perspective on certain relationships needed a major adjustment and helped me realize areas in my life that were broken. It has been hard – probably the hardest six months of my life, and I know He’s not done with me yet. But I’m grateful for the chance to see how God is using it all – my diagnosis, surgery, and recovery, in ways I never imagined.
I had a tearful realization this afternoon that carried over to mass this evening. I’m one month from my surgery date. The flood of emotions was overwhelming and unfortunately, I didn’t bring enough tissues with me to church. The girls were so sweet and tried to comfort me.
Tonight is the craft and cookie event for Saints Yes! at our church. (Saints Yes! is the social/activity group for 4th-6th graders that Jake and I are leading. Prep for this month’s event is more substantial than the other months. I ended up making over 60 sugar cookies and just about as many rice krispy bars. Here’s hoping the kids have fun crafting and decorating the treats.
I’m turning another year older in a few days – and it’s a “special” birthday.
My friend, Michelle, planned a get together at a local restaurant and a great group of friends showed up to help me celebrate! I wish I had had our server take a group picture of everyone, but one of my friends did capture these pictures for me. (The lone color one is of the ladies I know from our old parish – several who have known me since before we had kids.)
In the invite, Michelle offered to put together a spiritual bouquet for me. On the vase that held 40 roses are the prayers she collected. I can’t tell you how much the love, support, and friendship of the ladies who came tonight (and many others,) means to me – especially as I close in on the “T-2 months til surgery” mark, which coincidentally is my actual birthday. I am truly blessed to have so many beautiful women supporting me in the rough times and celebrating with me in the joyful times. ❤️
A friend of mine in my women’s group at church was recently telling me about how there have been times in her life when she has known she needs to go THROUGH something to get to the other side. There’s no going around the circumstances that have come my way or my family’s way lately. We can only go THROUGH them.
It’s been an extremely difficult week and a half. Probably one of the hardest to date. But I’ve clung to my faith (even if it was by a thread at times,) and have caught a glimpse of what my friend was talking about regarding going THROUGH our challenges. Then I saw this in the restroom at church today. Coincidence? I don’t think so.
I came home from picking up Shecklet #4 from preschool and someone had hung a red bag on the front door handle. (Going off a hunch, I did figure out who left me the thoughtful gift. She’s a sneaky one!) Inside the bag was a little box containing the Divine Mercy image. I have been repeating the phrase, “Jesus, I trust in You,” these past two weeks when my nerves or mind are spinning out of control. Now I also have the visual of Jesus’ mercy on my kitchen window sill. I am grateful for the way I have been able to see God’s comfort and consoling during this time of waiting and pray it continues.
Our Christmas Eve tradition of having my parents join us for mass and then soup supper continued another year. Shecklet #2 and I went to the church early enough to get enough pew space for us to sit in this year. (He selected our spot and sat on the end so he could see 🙂.)
After mass, we were able to get a few family photos, which are always so fun to look back on.
Tomorrow afternoon we will head to my parents’ house to celebrate with Tony and Kristin and their kids. It will be fun to have all of the Cimperman cousins together.
I’m putting away fall decor today and pulling out Advent and Xmas decorations. Shecklet #4 is enjoying playing with the nativity set.
Thanks to the crazy contagious/illness fall we had, our KS friends stopped to visit a couple of times during their trip to MN in lieu of staying with us. We always pick right back up where we left off – not something every friendship is able to do. This crazy bunch of kids (plus one from another friend’s family) just keeps growing! Love how they all enjoy one another’s company – just like their parents do.
And of course, here is Shecklet #4 with her godparents.
Peg doll saints lined up on the window sill.